So, this piece is me asking for your advice. Recently, I’ve been considering the process of having a one night stand. Normally, it wouldn’t be something I would consider because of the usual fears: the danger, the fear of the unknown and the fact that I still have my virginity well and truly intact. But after speaking to a lot of my friends at uni, I feel like it’s a process I’ve been missing out on. I hear things like ‘are you even in first year if you haven’t experienced a walk of shame’ and I haven’t.
It sounds like I’m being peer pressured into it, but I’m not. It’s something that sounds fun and interesting; something that appears to make you feel desired from the first moment they see you in the club, to the moment when you end up back at their flat. This is how it’s been explained to me anyway. Don’t get me wrong, I love the thought of sex. I can’t wait to experience the thrill, the feeling of being loved and desired but, for me, a one night stand didn’t automatically have those connotations. I always imagined them to be rushed and sordid in a dingy hotel, having to make excuses to leave the morning after because there was never a time set for a one night stand to end. I always imagined my first time to be something romantic, tender and loving. But that might just be because society has told me that’s what I want. The more I contemplate having a one night stand the more I think it seems liberating but I’m also scared.
Obviously, not all the stories I’ve heard have been great, my best friend from home had a dire experience with whips and chains which put her off for life… until the next one. But there we go I guess, you have some casualties. Let me know what you think, send in your stories and help me make my decision
Over and out